I’m feeling pretty good lately. Yesterday, the PSSAs ended and spring officially began. The countdown to the end of the year has officially begun. Days are longer (and a little bit warmer), Easter break is a mere two and a half weeks away, and next week ends our third marking period (which means only 9 more weeks of school to go!). Yes, life is feeling better.
Now, don’t get me wrong – I am still stressed. My students are going to get spring fever soon (if they don’t have it already), and any sense of productiveness or urgency that the PSSAs lended is out the window. My team teachers warned me of the “Last Nine Weeks” as this ominous time where nothing gets done and the students are even lazier than normal (great). I am sure I am going to get a lot of “can we watch a movie today?” or “can we play a game today?” or “do we HAVE to do something today?” – I’ll probably get those questions every day. And I still want to TEACH them – I’m planning on starting the big Greek Mythology Unit on Monday (which is going to take us a month) and I still want them to read and I still want them to write and I still want them to THINK because they seem not to do a lot of that outside of school.
And yet, the stresses of all that are underlined by the fact that summer is almost here. Almost here! Anyone who knows me knows I live for summer. Yes, I love the fall and Bloomsburg Fair week, and I love the holidays, but during both of those times, underneath it all, I am longing for summer. I can’t help it – warm weather, boating, swimming, no school . . . how can you not love it? (unless you’re my husband who hates hot weather because he likes to be cold . . . but even he is looking forward to summer this year). Knowing that summer is only an arm’s length away makes all the stresses above that much tolerable. In January/February, it is like you’re stuck in this thick, black fog where the only thing you can see is the day ahead of you. There’s no light at the end of the tunnel; in fact, the only thing you’re moving towards are the state-mandated tests. In that fact it’s dark and depressing, and you feel as though you’ll never get out of it. Yet, now that the fog has lifted and it is bright and sunny (which it is right now, in fact), everything feels that much better, even if it’s not. I feel optimistic. I feel hopeful. (I kind of feel like campaign Barack Obama).
However, and I just told this to my husband yesterday, I also think part of my optimism is that I am not resisting teaching middle school. In fact, I think I kind of like it. Yes, I do feel stressed out about it a lot, but a lot of that is because of our crazy schedule and the lack of walls/doors in our classrooms (did I ever mention that before? – we have no real walls or doors in most of the classrooms – noise carries. It sucks) and the stress of being a first-year teacher. While there are some high school openings coming up this summer that I could apply for, part of me is hesitating now. I can do a lot of cool things with middle schoolers. I have a lot of freedom with my curriculum. If I moved schools or taught high school, I am pretty sure that freedom would go out the window. Now, I don’t think that Milton is necessarily the right school for me – in fact, I’m leaning in the other direction on that one – but I’m willing to give it another shot or two.
So, with warm, sunny weekend ahead of me, and summer just down the road, it is easy, I think, to see why I have a spring in my step. And I must admit, I have been dragging my feet for so long lately, that it feels really good.